Time 4 Sum Aksion

Trench: Marina Luna, Skirt: Banana Republic, Shirt: H&M, Shoes: ShoeDazzle, Bracelet: I cannot for the life of me remember, Watch: Michael Kors, Bag: Forever 21 (photos: Carrie Hawkins Foust)

Time to get serious. Have you ever looked in the mirror (especially..*gasp*....naked) and wanted to vomit. I mean, seriously gotten mad at yourself? Welp...I am there. I mean....really...there. I am NOT saying that I am morbidly obese. I am not even saying that I am as in large and in charge as I have been at other points in my life. I am saying though that I do not like this feeling. I feel like I have thrown caution to the wind a bit. Enjoyed one (or 18) too many extravagant late night meals out followed by a couple glasses of wine, and then headed straight to bed. My clothes are a little snug, my motivation a little low, and I feel like crap. Now...I know this is a style blog, not a diary. However, if you don't feel good about yourself, nothing you put on is going to make you feel any better and (damn it) I want to feel better. I am also NOT saying that I am vying to be skinny. Frankly, I don't really care for skinny. I like strength, curves, and a womanly shape. I want all of those things...I just want them a little tighter and more toned than they are right now. I am so close to 32 years old that I can smell it. I am not going to sit here and tell you that losing or maintaining a weight that I am happy with has traditionally been easy for me. Anyone who has known me for a long time knows it has not. It has become a little harder since I have gotten a bit older, but not much more difficult than it has always been for me. I had lunch today with a couple of girlfriends (and I always have long talks with my BFF about all this); I am amazed at how much body image issues impact women's lives. We all know (or we should know by now) that everyone's bodies are different and thank God that they are. How boring would life be if everyone looked the same? A number on a scale does not define us, or detract from all of the amazing things we do on a daily basis. It does not "make" us who we are where it counts. What saddens me though is that when we do not feel like our "best" selves, we shrink back a bit. It happens almost unconsciously at times. We walk differently, our moods are impacted, our minds preoccupied. It is sad, but it is true. I have, unfortunately,  seen body image issues become such a big part of women's psyches that they are controlled by them. Some women stay in relationships with jerks...real morons, because they do not truly believe that anyone else will have them. I have seen them let their lives pass them by because they don't want to go out and really live them. The thought of getting up, finding something to wear that makes them feel okay, and going out in public is so overwhelming and stressful that they just sit around and live vicariously through other people. It is sad. It breaks my heart (and I am not being dramatic when I say that). I am not saying that I am "there", but I have been there and I do not want to go back. So, I think it's time to shut up, stop feeling sorry for myself, and make some changes. I am publicly putting it out there to hold myself accountable. So there you have it folks. Time for some action...time, time, for some time, for some action and yes, for all of you old school rap fans....I am most definitely quoting Redman there (from like 1992). Of course to be fair to Redman, I should say... "Time 4 Sum Aksion".