7.28.2013

Cry Baby








This is what I wore on Saturday. The day I cried. A lot. Maybe.... ten different times. Seriously. I don't know what came over me. It was the good kind of cry though. The cleansing kind. The releasing kind of cry.

I got up at 7:30am, met two girlfriends for breakfast at 8:30... and by 9:00am... my eyes were welling up. Just like that... Big.Fat.Tears rolling down my face. We were three women... three friends... dealing with love, loss, expectations, pain, and joy. We skipped small talk (even though we hadn't seen each other in ages) and jumped straight off the high dive of life. I think all three of us cried a little over our coffee and fruit. It was as if no time had passed. We picked up right where we left off.  We discussed everything that we needed to, and nothing that we didn't. We hugged at the end and left with much fuller cups then we came in with.

Later in the afternoon I had an introductory meeting with a woman who works at my church. We met to quickly discuss volunteer opportunities and logistics, and then ended up discussing life... faith... grace... forgiveness... kindness... mercy. Not religion. Not Exclusion. Inclusion. Making a life, versus just a living. Know what I'm saying? I cried... a little. Walked in strangers, left friends.

And then the water works grand finale. I met my best friend in the whole world for dinner. My person in this life. My soul's mate. We met up to have a lighthearted dinner... a few laughs... just to catch up and get out for a minute. We spent 2 hours in the restaurant, and another 2 standing, talking in the parking lot. The parking lot... that is where Shit.Got.Real. We were both going through so much that was right under the surface. The stuff you don't share with anyone else. The ugly parts. Where the fear and resentment reside, and under that... the hope. The real good stuff. I cried my eyes out, we hugged, took a deep breathe, got in our separate cars to go home and had a new found strength. A strength that women can only get from other women.

I don't trust women who claim not to have any female friends (or at least want them). I have only ever heard women say that when they are trying to impress men. Right? Like.... "Oh, I'm not really friends with girls... most of my friends are guys". Get the hell out of here with that crap. The women that I have heard say this are either... A). Threatened by other women ("it's not me... it's just that other women are jealous of me"... sure they are, Honey)... or  B). Trying to get a man to believe that they are SO cool and "drama free" that they don't even associate with their own gender. Why do women think it is cool to disassociate with other women? The right women give each other strength and encouragement. We lift each other up. We relate. We give one another permission to be emotional creatures. Our hugs repair hearts. We speak with our eyes, not saying a word. We are phenomenal creatures and we are lucky to call each other "friend". We live in a world where you can have 800 Facebook friends and no one to have lunch with. I cannot be the only one who finds something wrong with that. I cried with four different women today, at different times, about various things... and I have never felt better.

3 comments:

  1. Amen Melissa, I can so relate to this. I have two best girl friends, one that I grew up with and one I met a couple years ago through work. We give each other so much strength and encouragement, wouldnt know what I would do without them. Isn't it a great feeling you can cry with each other? Great sharing Melissa :-)

    Ani
    www.fleurani.blogspot.de

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  2. Love you, Gray... and Ani... I cannot wait to meet you in real life. I feel as though we are already friends. XOXOXO

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